Sunday, July 29, 2007
Assalamualaikum. Sometimes I wonder if I am expecting too much from the people around me. Is LIFE like this? Nobody understand your feelings? Watching Aya in One Litre of tears inspire me a lot and make me realise a lot of things. I do regret some things that I've done. I want to buy myself the DVD so that I can keep watching and keep myself aware of how important health and life is. How great is it being able to walk? How great is it being able to talk? How great is it being able to eat? We keep asking for more, but have we ever thought about other people in the world. They are asking things that we have and things that we take them for granted. We have to be thankful for every little blessing that we have. I can't wait to go to university. Being together with my new friends... I want to study again!
Saturday, July 28, 2007
Assalamualaikum. Had a series of events that happened last week. Lots of surprises. First was the 4PM semi-finals debate. True that it was a tough fight but still, historyu repeats again.
Siapa kata pisang takkan berbuah dua kali? With their "professionalism", I believe it will happen again and again until someone who has the brains and vision take over to lead this debate 4PM. I really think Fizah should win the Best Speaker. She was really good that day. Oh ya, now I have to think twice if I wish to say that this event is a prestigious one because the topic(
mauduk) itself has a grammar mistake.
Kelewahan bahasa.
Masyarakat Singapura masih belum menghayati mesej keharmonian kaum dengan mendalam. Mengahayati bermaksud menjiwai, sesuatu yang sudah sebati dan meresap kedalam sanubari mahupun nurani seseorang. Bagaimana mungkin sesuatu itu dihayati dengan mendalam sedangkan menghayati itu sudah cukup mendalam. Hendak mendalam macam mana lagi sedangkan mesej itu sudah berada dalam nurani masyarakat Singapura? Hendak mendalam sampai masuk ke dalam segala urat saraf atau hendak mendalam hingga ke usus?And the irony the three "brilliant" judges can still comment that we never debate about the "mendalam". Ya, I will do something till this thing will be
dihayati by you
dengan cukup mendalam hingga ke dalam usus! I will do something about this. Even the Piala Berita Harian is better. That is only secondary school standard. Pretty shameful. But I will help them in my way! How? It will be a secret between me and Fizah. Hahaha...
Next is the arrival of my second nephew. It was so unexpected. The due date the doctor gave is August 9th. This is the good news that I wanted to share with you guys in the previous post. Will be posting his picture soon. I think both of theirs. Mohamed Aisy Daanyaal and Mohamed Raayaan Haiqal. So cute! Haiz, but will I look older? Gosh!
Next was the sudden new posting order. After 2 weeks at the SCDF HQ Medical Centre, the people there are nice even though they speak in Mandarin most of the time, I have to leave the place. I can read books there and I even set a personal record. Reading A Samad Said's book in a day. Dear Malay 'A' students, you girls should know how thick his books right? Hahahaha... oh ya, the new posting order. I will be posted to Paya Lebar Fire Station as an Ambulance Attendance. This time round, I will really be there when you call 995 especially those who stay around Geylang, Ubi, Eunos and of course Paya Lebar.
Went to Basic Rescue Training Centre and Civil Defence Academy yesterday. It was so nice to meet myt friends back there. Luqman, Denise and Osman. Luqman said that I look thinner and Denise said that I am fairer. Hmmm... Is that true?
Thursday, July 19, 2007
Assalamualaikum! Alhamdulillah. I am so happy and excited too! What for, let it be a secret! I'll let you guys know soon! I am very excited!
Anyway, will be going to Innova Junior College tomorrow after work. I'll stay there, latest till 8p.m. I will be coaching the Malay Debate team as they will be having their semi-finals match this weekend against Madrasah Al-Ma'rif. Last year, we debated with this school too and I hope this year the winner will still stay the same, both for the overall debate and the best speaker. Go Innova! Go! Reach for the stars!
Ad Astra. Ex-innovians and my dear friends, pray for Innova's success!
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Assalamualaikum. 1 weeks and 2 days at the HQ Medical Centre. Not bad. Actually, I quite like it there. I have plenty of time to myself. I finish reading two books already over these 5 days. More books to come. Any books to recommend? For now, I am just leaving the "wish to go to station" thingy to fate. If I am fated to go to station, sooner or later I will definitely go to station. So I'll just leave that to station. There are so may things that I can think and use my brain cells for. Now, I am busy choosing colours to repaint my house. Gosh! Another headache.
I want to be happy. I will not wait for anyone to give or engender the happiness in me. Let it come naturally, with or without that special one, I want to be happy. I should not depend on anyone for that. I live my own life. This life is for me to live. Waste it, I and not other people will regret. We live once, and as evry breath we take in, it is another second closer to death. I want to make the full use out of it. If listening and looking at Datuk Siti Nurhaliza's pictures can make me happy, I will listen and look at lots of it! Hey, I need to find the source of my happiness.
Monday, July 16, 2007
Assalamualaikum. Those who passes out proudly exhibit their badge and certificates. They are those who are in stations or become instructors. Well, to me these two things are nothing, simply nothing. I just hope what they will be "blessed" for what they have done to me.
Aku ibarat apa?
Ibarat lembu yang digarap hidungnya
Ibarat bumi melutut pada perbuatan manusia
Ibarat lilin dibakar buat menerang si gelita
Ataupun
Ibarat pokok yang menjadi paksi dunia
Sirna teguhanku bila ditertawa
Sirna tenagaku bila diinjak terus melara
Sirna semangatku bila ditipu bagai si buta
Sirna tawaku bila dicengkam noda durjana
Entah sampai bila harusku menelan bara
Perlukah aku terus berdiam diri berdukacita?
Haruskah aku pertahankan tugu imanku bak betara?
Mestikah aku bangun menerjang si sialan yang berkalbu cuka?
Biarkan Dia yang menentukan segala-gala, aku hanya menunduk serta
Friday, July 13, 2007
Assalamualaikum. Finally, I have received my final posting order. I am posted to Singapore Civil Defence Force Headquater's Medical Centre as a Paramedic Level 1/ Medic. The Medical Centre looks like a clinic basically. Much smaller compared to the one at Civil Defence Academy. Well, I am the only Malay Medic there. All of them are Chinese, and they speak in Mandarin everytime. Even the Doctor is Chinese but one good thing about him, he don't speak Mandarin. He speaks perfect English, oh well ex- NJC student. He is a nice man but strict, sometimes, too strict. He don't look like a doctor, more like a DART team member. Actually, I was disappointed initially when I get to know that I am posted to HQ Medical Centre. I really want to be in the frontline, helping people in need but, but, but I think I have to thankful that I am in the HQ Medical Centre. My Medic friend just told me that he attended a case of accident where the casualty died and the father was crying and all. Gosh, I may not be able to take that. I cannot see people cry. High chances that I will cry too, and I will feel moody for the rest of the day. That is bad.
I need an escape and thankfully, one is coming. I will be out of the country tomorrow and will be back by Sunday.
Sunday, July 1, 2007
Assalamualaikum. Yesterday, I happened to read the LIFE section of the Straits Time. I came across the Horoscope section. Although that I was told not to believe in it, I just like to read it for fun.
And my horoscope said something like: Longing for the past? Those 'might have been' are so seductive, but you have to get past the illusion and deal with the reality of where you are now. Leave memories where they belong and pay attention to the present.
Must I leave my past behind? Pay more attention to my cruel present?
After watching my inspiration-boost drama, One Liter of Tears, I begin to feel that I need to be more thankful. Ignore the people around me. They are not suffering when I am. Why should I let them hurt me? It is my emotion. I am blessed to still be able to control this body of mine which include my brain, my heart and my emotion too. Should I face any trouble, the pain that I have to experience is inevitable, but the suffering is an option. I can choose to suffer or not. Let them say whatever about me as they wish, true it hurts me but let the suffering end. Only God knows who I am. He is the only one. Whatever I say, whatever I write, whatever reaction I take, He has the right interpretation. Only He knows. We bother so much how people think about us but have we ever bother to think what our God think of us? People around me have hurt me so much but why am I still hurting myself by remembering and bringing the past memories back to the present. Must I really leave my past behind and look forward for a brighter new day?
Sometimes we think that we are the most unlucky person (individual) in the world, but I guess we have to reach out and open our eyes further, look around and see what kind of suffering other people are facing? Are we more unlucky than a cancer patient, or are we more unlucky than a bed-ridden patient? They are bed-ridden; they are unable to make a change in their life. But we are not, we are still blessed to be able to make changes and improve ourselves. So what if some people hate me, I should be thankful that they are still some people who like me. Up till today, we human beings always seek for a balance. To achieve some balance, if I am happy that there are people who like me, I also need to be happy that there are also some people who hate me because they are the one who keep me rooted to the ground. I want to soar, yet rooted. Volatilis Tamen Radicalis.
