Wednesday, March 7, 2007
Assalamualaikum. Gosh it is less than a week now. In 5 days, I will be enlisted. I am going to miss a lot of things. My computer, blogging, listening to my favourite songs, meeting my friends(I rarely do this), going to my favourite places and the list goes on...
In preparation, I went shopping just now and got a new pair of spectacles. Actually, I have no idea what to bring on that day. I need some guidance but where can I find someone close to me who is
from Singapore Civil Defence Force. Majority of my friends are in the army...stranded away in Pulau Tekong. Haizzz. Never mind. I will figure it out soon.
The last few days were pretty happening for me. I left Singapore on Saturday. Stayed at my grandma's house in Malacca. A lot of things happened. I went through a jungle and saw so may wild plants ever in my life and I love the fresh air. A lot of things learnt. I feel so far ahaed from my cousins. I've left them far behind in terms of academic, modernisation and etc. They live a simple life. Not poor but a comfortable life. Serenity. Peaceful. And the best thing is that, they
are happy with their life. Satisfied with the things they have... but me? I feel so... Arghh. I need to learn to be satisfied but I must not stop trying. Trying to get to the peak. Be it if I am going to be the only one who goes to the university. Be it. I should be proud to lead them. Sometimes I feel that I am selfish when I look at them. Over here, I am entering university and there, my cousins are struggling with their studies but I think again... I manage to come thus far with hard work(not sleepless night), stress... I am glad that somehow I manage to help them with their studies the other day at Malacca. How I wish I can bring all of them over here in Singapore.
I am close to my young cousins in Malaysia. It is pity that they are not here in me. I feel lonely sometimes. Felt pretty jealous when I see my friends having a great time with their cousins. The cousins here that I have in Singapore are so much older than me. Some of them already have grandchildren. I feel odd when I am with them. My sister mix well with them but not me. When Hari Raya comes, instead of talking to my relatives, I go to the kitchen to prepare drinks and stuffs or chat with my Sis's maid. Hahaha... Some people do have a problem seeing me talking with the maids...I don't care. They are still human people who deserves respect. Learning about their pay and etc, I pity them. The workload is so much and yet paid so little. Okay,
I am digressing. Gosh! Heard that 2 of my cousins are getting married this year. I hope I will be able to leave the country to attend their wedding. Weddings there are different from the way it is done over here. There really follow the traditions and the food, walah! The food are prepared by the villagers themselves and nothing about caterers and etc. The meat are from their own poultry(except chicken because there won't be enough). They have fireworks, joget lambak
, acara berinai
and etc. Gosh! I do no want to miss all these.